


take my heart (i ain't want it back)

by kyomohokus



Category: SixTONES (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Coming Out, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-12
Updated: 2021-02-12
Packaged: 2021-03-12 14:20:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,509
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29386200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kyomohokus/pseuds/kyomohokus
Summary: Hokuto doesn’t think about the pull in his chest and the want in his stomach. It’s just a game.Alternatively, the four times Hokuto and Taiga pretended they were dating and that one time they decided to date for real.
Relationships: Kyomoto Taiga/Matsumura Hokuto
Comments: 3
Kudos: 21





	take my heart (i ain't want it back)

**Author's Note:**

> It's me not making a multi-chaptered fic? Can you believe it??

**I.**

Hokuto hates parties. He considers himself an introvert, and he would rather spend the entire night by himself, reading a book, instead of being in a loud, crowded club where everyone is making new friends, finding someone to make out with, or get very, very drunk. Maybe even a combination of the three.

So why is he in a loud, crowded club at the moment? He blames it on Juri and Shintaro. His dorm roommates told him he should make more friends, live life more, yadda yadda. And Hokuto figures it’s better to go so they’ll stop pestering him in the future.

But he regrets going the moment Juri and Shintaro leave him alone. Juri has a circle of admirers in one corner and Shintaro … well, where the hell is he?

Sighing, Hokuto pushes through the crowd jamming to a song being played by the DJ—the one with loud bass beats that gives Hokuto a headache. He sighs in relief once he’s in the hallway, definitely quieter and easier to breathe in.

It’s midway through his walk when he realizes he’s not the only person in the hallway. He spots two people, one of who he recognizes.

It’s Kyomoto Taiga. He and Hokuto are not really friends—they know each other because they have a mutual friend (Juri) and they went to several campus events. But even if they don’t know each other, Hokuto would have heard of Taiga—his looks, his artistic skills, his singing voice.

On the other hand, the guy resting his hand on the wall next to Taiga’s face is one he doesn’t recognize. What Hokuto can tell as much is that he’s older than him and Taiga. _Too old to be hanging around a club where university students frequent_ , his brain supplies.

There’s panic in Taiga’s face, and warning bells ring in Hokuto’s ears.

He’s very much sober, but his limbs move of their own accord, walking toward Taiga and shoving the stranger out of the way. Hokuto winds his arm tightly around Taiga’s neck, pulling him into a side-hug. Without hesitation, Taiga clings to him, wrapping his arms around Hokuto’s waist.

“Babe, there you are!” Hokuto finds himself saying, against better judgment. “I was out there looking for you. Come on, let’s get out of this place.”

And like that, Hokuto has his hand around Taiga’s upper arm, guiding him toward the exit. Taiga willingly stumbles after him. Hokuto tries to watch their feet, bumping into as little people as possible as Hokuto steers Taiga through the club.

Finally, they reach the exit, the cold night’s air stinging against his cheeks.

“Are you okay?” Hokuto asks as soon as the emergency exit door falls shut behind them.

Taiga’s face turns from pale to green, and he manages to turn away before he hurls against the back wall of the club. Hokuto feels like he should check up on Taiga, so he does, rubbing his hand on Taiga’s back as he throws up splashes of alcohol.

Eventually, Taiga’s heaving turns into dry heaving. He stands back up, and Hokuto holds him steady until he’s on both of his feet.

“You okay?” Hokuto asks again, his hand on Taiga’s waist.

Taiga nods, back to being pale. “Super duper okay.”

“You should get home. Did you come here with someone?”

Another nod. “Jesse …” he mumbles, fumbling in his jeans for his phone. “He went off with someone …” He manages to unlock his phone, scroll through his message, and then mumble a swear word. “And ditched me, too.”

Hokuto sighs. Juri and Shintaro are still somewhere inside, and they probably wouldn’t be looking for him until much later. Hokuto can shoot them a text anyway. “Where do you live?”

Taiga recites his address, and it just happens to be closer to Hokuto’s. “I’ll take you home,” he volunteers. “You got your keys?”

Taiga instinctively reaches for something inside his pocket and nods.

“Let’s get you something to eat to get rid of that hangover. Then I’ll take you home.”

He texts Juri and Shintaro as he and Taiga walk out of the club and into the busy streets of Shibuya in the evening. Hokuto settles for a nearby Family Mart, where he buys them two cups of coffee and two packs of _onigiri_.

Taiga is leaning is head against the glass window when Hokuto arrives, some of the color returning to his cheeks. He manages a smile as Hokuto sets down the tray. “Thank you.”

Hokuto shakes his head, pushing the cup of coffee and onigiri toward Taiga. “Eat up. Helps with your hangover the next day.”

They don’t really talk. Hokuto can’t think of anything to talk about, and Taiga is clearly still drunk and shaken up about the incident. Taiga doesn’t force a conversation, and neither does Hokuto.

Even their walk back to Taiga’s apartment is quiet, but Hokuto doesn’t mind. At least Taiga isn’t stumbling anymore, at least, not as much. If anything, the stumbling is due to Taiga’s drooping eyes rather than intoxication.

“You want me to walk you up?” Hokuto offers as they reach the entrance of the apartment building.

Taiga smiles and shakes his head. “I’ll be fine. Thank you, Matsumura. Take care on the way home, okay?”

Hokuto manages a smile, too. For all it’s worth, it had been a pretty eventful night. Plus, he had an excuse to leave.

**Kyomoto,** 2:16 pm  
Hey, thanks again for saving me back in the club. Hope we see each other around? :)

**Matsumura,** 2:17 pm  
No worries. :) Hope your head isn’t killing you too much right now.

Hokuto reads the text three times. Something warm and unfamiliar makes his stomach feel fuzzy. He frowns and wonders what that could be.

By the time Monday rolls around, and Taiga and Jesse joins them for lunch after Juri waves them over, Hokuto had forgotten about that fuzzy feeling.

**II.**

Since he had rescued Taiga that night at the club, they’ve been texting and talking to each other when the opportunity arises. Hokuto would like to think of them as friends now, not just acquaintances. It just so happens that their last class on Wednesdays usually end on the same time, so they often walk home together.

One Wednesday, Taiga nods at him in greeting when they spot each other by the gate but stops short when a female voice calls Hokuto. When Hokuto turns to look, it’s Tsuchiya Tao.

“Matsumura-kun, how are you?” Tao asks, a friendly smile on her face.

It’s not that Hokuto dislikes her. Tao is one of the most popular girls in their year, and she’s nice, but Hokuto had never gotten over the initial awkwardness he had developed toward her when they were forced to share a kiss during a game of Spin the Bottle during freshman year. Hokuto had been told by Juri who had been told by a certain Asahina Aya that Tao had developed a crush on him afterward. While Hokuto feels nothing of that sort for her, he still tries to be as well-mannered as he can be to her. Even if he could feel his hands clamming up.

“Good.” He inconspicuously wipes his palms on his jeans and clears his throat. “And you?”

“Oh, I’m fine.” She leans into him until their shoulders are pressed together. “What did you think of Professor Matsuoka’s lecture this morning?”

Hokuto hums, trying to come up with some excuse to get away from this situation.

A moment later, Taiga skips and stands next to him.

“Hi!” he says brightly, shooting Tao a dazzling smile as he leans forward. Apart from all his usual Taiga-related emotions, Hokuto also feels a pang of jealousy. Taiga is so naturally gorgeous in a way that Hokuto could merely admire from afar.

“Hey,” Taiga says in a lower voice, just to him. And if Hokuto wouldn’t have known better, he would have thought Taiga’s voice sounded sultry. His eyebrows rise when Taiga takes one of his hands, intertwining their fingers.

Taiga wriggles his eyebrows in response, and it wasn’t until he speaks again that Hokuto finally catches on. “Aren’t you going to introduce me?”

“Oh. _Oh_. Right.”

Tao is looking slightly confused. Hokuto tries to channel Taiga’s energy into smiling cheerily. “Tsuchiya-san, this is Kyomoto Taiga. He’s in our year, but he’s in the art program, and uh—”

“I’m his boyfriend,” Taiga supplies.

Tao’s mouth opens for a split second before she manages to shake herself out of it. “Oh, that’s great!” she squeaks out, her cheeks pink. “Anyway, I have to go. See you in class tomorrow, Matsumura-kun!”

It takes a while before the both of them make a move. “You’re my savior,” Hokuto tells Taiga the moment Tao rounds a corner.

“You saved my life by pretending to be my boyfriend, so I’m returning the favor.” Taiga grins.

“You do know that the entire third year is going to know about this”—Hokuto nods where there hands are still intertwined—“in an hour, right?”

“Eh.” Taiga lets go of his hand, and Hokuto can’t help but mourn the loss. “Let them talk. I don’t mind. Much more important is that you’re okay.”

Hokuto smiles. “I’m okay. Thanks for saving me.”

“No problem. _Fake boyfriend_.”

For a moment, they just smile at each other. Hokuto is still smiling as they go on their separate ways.

**III**

The third time technically doesn’t exactly involve the need to save each other. Taiga had asked if they could do some shopping for a mutual friend’s birthday party. Hokuto, having nothing to do at home and wanting to spend some time with Taiga, agrees.

Their day doesn’t end with the shopping. Hokuto stops on his tracks when he spots a book café, and Taiga lets them pop inside. Eventually, they lounge around in one of the cozy seats and sip coffee. Taiga sketches something while Hokuto curls up with a book he had randomly picked off the shelf. From across them, an old lady is sipping her tea.

“I’m gonna go get another snack,” Taiga declares after a couple of hours of comfortable silence. He stands up and dusts his jeans. “Hokku, baby, do you want to get anything?”

For a moment, Hokuto wants nothing more than for the ground to swallow him whole. Taiga had picked up the nickname from Juri, the first morning Taiga had slept over after a long night of hanging out. Juri had been thrilled when he had found them in the kitchen during breakfast, and despite Hokuto’s assurances that Taiga was, in fact, not his “cute boyfriend,” Juri had suggested the nickname and practically pride-cuddled Hokuto to death.

Taiga had watched them with amusement and had since then used the nickname whenever he felt like making Hokuto turn red with embarrassment. Right now, Hokuto’s face is hot as the old lady’s eyes land on him.

“Whatever you order is good with me,” he says before ducking his head back to the book. His cheeks are still burning by the time Taiga leaves.

It’s only when Taiga returns with a slice of cake that Hokuto catches the old lady staring. He quickly turns toward Taiga, who is ranting about some art project he’s working on.

Hokuto doesn’t understand the half of it, but he’s pretty happy to just listen to Taiga talk, watch the way his eyes sparkle and his hands draw his ideas into the air between them. It’s when Taiga takes his hands to make Hokuto follow the … paintbrush strokes (?) that Hokuto notices the old lady was still looking at them. Hokuto feels his heartbeat quicken and he wants to back away from Taiga, separate their hands, but then the old lady clears her throat.

“Excuse me.” Her voice is quiet but her gaze is strong.

Taiga stops talking to look at her, and Hokuto swallows the lump in his throat. Logically, there’s nothing she could do to them. They’re in a public place and she’s older than Hokuto and Taiga’s ages combined. Still, words bleed, too. Fear knots his stomach.

“Yes?” Taiga asks casually.

“Are you two together?”

Hokuto wants to leave. He wants to go and pack his bags and leave for Shizuoka.

Taiga’s grip on his hand tightens. “Yes, we are. This is my boyfriend. Isn’t he handsome?”

Hokuto closes his eyes for a second before he gathers the courage to glance at the old lady. To his surprise, she’s smiling.

“That’s wonderful,” she remarks. “Young love.”

“He _is_ wonderful,” Taiga muses, and the old lady’s eyes light up.

“Oh, look, he’s blushing. Such a sweet boy. Hold on to him tightly!”

“I will!”

They both laugh, and Hokuto feels dazed, as if he’s watching a train go by too fast. Everything is happening so fast, or maybe he’s processing everything slowly.

The old lady sighs contentedly. She looks like she wants to stay more, but she stands up and waves them goodbye. Next to him, Taiga waves back before he lets go of Hokuto.

“That’s nice,” Taiga remarks. “I’m glad we made her day.”

Hokuto fishes his phone out of his pocket and a moment later he hears the tune of the mobile game Taiga is addicted to. Hokuto doesn’t ask. He doesn’t think about the heaviness of Taiga’s hand over his. He doesn’t think about the joy in Taiga’s eyes when the old lady complimented them or how Taiga was so quick to claim Hokuto as his boyfriend in front of this stranger. Hokuto doesn’t think about the pull in his chest and the want in his stomach. It’s just a game. It’s always just a play they put up for the world, a little white lie of convenience. Almost like an inside joke between them. Taiga is unbothered by it.

Eventually they leave and go their separate ways. By the time Hokuto has gone up to his apartment, he had all but forgotten about the incident. It’s only Taiga’s voice at the back of his mind, asking _Isn’t he handsome?_ over and over again that remains.

**IV**

It happened the fourth time, but only it’s because Hokuto asked.

He finds Taiga by the lobby of the Fine Arts Department, leaning against the wall as he browses his phone. Hokuto calls his name, and he looks up, eyes bright as he waves in greeting.

“I hope I didn’t disturb you?” Hokuto asks as he approaches.

Taiga shakes his head. “Class doesn’t start in ten minutes. Everything okay?”

Hokuto takes a deep breath, ignoring the furious beating of his heart. “I’ll give you a month’s worth of whatever you want to eat and my left kidney if you come to dinner with my parents this weekend.”

Taiga looks at him with a confused smile, head tilting like a curious kitten. “What’s the catch?”

“Um,” Hokuto says, wiping his palms on his jeans. “I’ve thought of … telling them about me.” He squeezes his hands into fists. “Uh, me being gay. I just—”

“Okay,” Taiga interrupts before Hokuto could continue rambling.

Hokuto blinks. “Wait, really?”

“Yeah.” Taiga grins. “I can’t say no to a free meal for a month.”

“Is it also a free meal if you have to be pretend to be my boyfriend … again?”

Taiga raises his eyebrows.

“It’s just—” Hokuto says quickly. “I’m scared my parents won’t believe me if I don’t bring any … proof. I know that sounds awful, but they’re my parents and … it would be nice to have you there.”

Hokuto watches as a gentle smile makes the corners of Taiga’s mouth curl upward.

“Okay,” Taiga says, and Hokuto thinks he looks ethereal in the shitty light of the Fine Arts building. “I’ll be the best fake boyfriend you’ll ever have.”

Hokuto laughs because it’s the only relief he could think of for all the energy inside his chest. “Thank you.”

Taiga winks at him, and that certain spark in his eyes dazzles Hokuto. Then the bell rings, and Taiga waves him goodbye before entering the nearby classroom.

The rest of the week passes in a haze, being busy with classes, playing video games with Shintaro, and library sessions with Juri in preparation for their final exams. He and Taiga didn’t talk until Saturday afternoon, when they take the train to head to Hokuto’s house in Shizuoka.

His mother hugs him tightly when the door opens, and she does the same to Taiga. His father shakes Taiga’s hand firmly after giving Hokuto an affectionate pat on the shoulder.

His parents seem to be charmed by Taiga during the first few minutes of dinner. His mother rambles on as he heaps food onto Taiga’s plate. Taiga is nothing less than perfect with his parents, filling every lull in conversation with amusing stories. It’s almost captivating, how easily he had wrapped them around his finger.

“I must say, Taiga-san,” his father says, pouring himself a glass of water. “No offense, but when Hokuto told us he’s bringing someone along, we actually thought we were going to meet a girlfriend.”

Hokuto feels his heart pound against his rib cage. He looks both his parents in the eye, and the words are there, lying on his tongue, but his mouth won’t open. He thinks he might die of a heart attack when he feels the pressure of fingertips against his palm. Taiga is squeezing his hand in encouragement and Hokuto heaves in a breath.

“Actually, I’m gay,” he blurts out without any further preamble.

“I’m his boyfriend,” Taiga adds not a second later. His voice is calm, and Hokuto watches his father’s eyebrows rise to unknown heights.

It’s his mother that speaks first. “That’s lovely, Hokuto.”

“I agree,” his father says. He clears his throat. “You’re happy?”

“Yes,” Hokuto says, feeling a smile pull up the corners of his mouth. “We’re very happy.”

Between them, Taiga lifts their intertwined hands and places them openly on the dining table.

“Good.” His father’s smile is pleased. “Then, Taiga-san, I think we can spare you the firm reminder. Just know that it happened in my mind.”

“Of course, Mr. Matsumura.”

It’s then that Hokuto can’t take it anymore. He stands up and gets to his father first, his mother joining in their hug a moment later. Hokuto feels tears prick the corner of his eyes, but he wipes them away quickly. He doesn’t want to make his mother cry.

“I love you, Hokuto. I’ve always loved you and I always will.” His mother presses a kiss against his temple and his father nods, patting his shoulder. “We love you. Thank you for telling us.”

Hokuto feels as light as air. He disentangles himself from their embrace. “I love you, too.”

He wipes his nose and turns to Taiga, who had moved in the direction of the door. Beaming at him, Taiga wiggles his eyebrows and Hokuto nods.

“We’re going up to my room,” Hokuto tells his parents, and they wave him off, his father calling after them.

“No funny business!”

As soon as he rounds the corner, Hokuto tackles Taiga into a hug, giggles bubbling up his throat. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

Hokuto hugs him until Taiga pats his back. He takes Taiga’s hand and pulls him up the stairs. He feels his cheeks heat up as soon as he opens the door to his bedroom.

**V.**

He expects Taiga to inspect his room with curiosity, maybe tease him a bit for his teddy bear bedsheets. What he finds instead is Taiga propped against the door, looking at him so fondly that Hokuto’s heartbeat quickens.

“Taiga?” Hokuto asks, confused.

It took a few seconds before Taiga could respond. “We should … date. For real, this time.”

 _Oh_.

But the confusion disappears, replaced with clarity. Because why not? By this time, Hokuto has figured out what the fuzzy feeling in his stomach means.

It’s with the way he wants Taiga to be the first to know when something good happens to him. Or when Taiga’s not with him, Hokuto checks his phone every three minutes to see if Taiga left him a message. Or the way he never wants to let go every time Taiga holds his hand.

So only one reply makes sense. Hokuto strides forward until there’s little space between them, and he leans in. Hokuto does it slowly, giving Taiga time to back out. When Taiga doesn’t, Hokuto clasps his hands on both sides of Taiga’s face and pulls him in.

Taiga’s lips are soft and warm against his, and it takes Hokuto only a moment before he opens his mouth. The feeling of Taiga’s tongue against his teeth is so brilliant that Hokuto’s knees almost give way.

“I wanted to ask you the same thing,” Hokuto says once Taiga pulls away from him to breathe.

Taiga smiles. “Really?”

Hokuto laughs, feeling weightless as the happiness bubbles up in his chest. “But we’ve been boyfriends for quite some time, haven’t we?”

Taiga grins and kisses him again. “No pretending this time?”

“Yeah,” Hokuto says, reaching for Taiga’s hand. “Yeah, I’d love that.”

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think in the comments! You can also talk to me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/narinarinori) or [CuriousCat](https://curiouscat.qa/narinarinori).


End file.
